Because Joey was technically a preemie (born before 37 weeks), he had to pass a car seat test before he could go home. Basically, he had to prove that he could keep his oxygen levels up while in a car seat for 1 1/2 hours.
We had him try this in the nursery during his first night. He failed miserably. And so began our experience in the nursery.
They decided to keep him in the nursery to monitor him. They hooked up a pulse oximeter to his foot to monitor his pulse and oxygen levels. He needed to keep the oxygen level above 90 but it kept falling. If it feel too low, they'd have to give him oxygen. He kept doing well for awhile and then dropping over and over again for awhile. This happened Saturday, Sunday, and Monday. I was released from the hospital on Sunday but got to stay as long as he was a patient in the nursery. I spent a lot of time in that room and got to know the nurses well. They ended up keeping him for 2 extra nights. During that time they kept his oxygen levels monitored and tested his blood sugar regularly. It was lower than it should be and he had lost too much weight - he was down to 7 lbs 7 oz. His Bilirubin levels were also up and they put him on the billi-lights. They also did an x-ray of his chest and gave him antibiotics through an iv in case these symptoms were a cause of an infection. The x-ray showed his heart slightly enlarged, though they told us that could be caused by him moving during the x-ray. In the early morning hours of Tuesday morning, they decided they weren't equipped to handle the care he needed. We were being sent to the NICU.
They were super efficient in getting him all ready to go and Spencer and I followed behind, as tears began to pour down my cheeks. Once in the NICU, they got him hooked up to a bunch of different things - there were cords hooked to his chest and belly, his foot, and through an IV. They also had stronger Billi-lights and a mask for the little guy. Different doctors and nurses and respiratory people came in a talked to us and worked on him.
They looked at me with pity in their eyes and tried to tell me encouraging things but nothing was working. I could barely look at them, let alone listen to what they were saying. I can't remember crying more in one day than I did that day. My eyes were almost completely swollen shut.
It's a terrifying thing, to see your precious little baby hooked up to so many things - to not be able to hold him much, except to feed him, and to just feel so helpless. Spencer, especially felt helpless. That day someone came in and did an echo cardiogram on his heart and they sent it off to Primary's to have it read. They put him on a three hour feeding schedule and we were allowed to stay the night in our room one more night.
Spencer took this picture of Joey right after he was all settled in. I posted it online on Instagram and Facebook to let friends and family know what was going on. This is what I wrote as a caption: Little baby Joseph in his superhero get up - mask and light saber included! 3 1/2 weeks was a bit too early for this handsome guy. He got moved to the NICU this morning where he'll get the care he needs to catch up. Once the tears stop flowing involuntarily from my eyes, I'm sure I'll be fine too.
I got 37 comments on my Facebook page, 12 on my Instagram, and at least 3 people called the compassionate service leader to ask if they could bring us more meals. The love and support was overwhelming and soon I was crying more - this time tears of gratitude.
My mom took care of the kids for almost a whole week straight and then came over for at least a few hours every day after that, to help out while Spencer came to the hospital. The ward provided dinner for 10 days. Ashley came over to clean out and set up the nursery.
It was an amazing experience to be cared for and given service like that. I didn't clean, do laundry, go grocery shopping, etc... for two weeks. My life was eat, nurse, pump, eat, sleep, repeat. I was able to focus on the most important things - my family.
The other thing that helped a lot was visitors. While he was in the nursery upstairs, we couldn't have visitors. But in the NICU we could. There were rules and everyone had to wash up but they could come! We brought the big kids one day with my mom. My mom also visited another day. My grandparents came down one evening. Another evening Hillary came to visit. Another evening Katie and then Tyler came. It was so nice to have someone else to talk to - especially when they came while I was there late at night.
My aunts also sent so many fun things for us. Jeanie and Kay sent flowers to me and the kids. They sent cupcakes for the NICU nurses, and cake and ice cream so the kids could celebrate Joey's birthday. This was really hard on Lucy, Sammy, and Eliza but they dealt with it like champs!
One shining thing in all this: Katie and Jeremiah had been my friends from college. A few years later they moved to Salt Lake and we reconnected for a few years before they moved away. I hadn't seen them for 5 years. Well, on the Monday after I had Joey, I got a message on Facebook from Katie who had seen I had had a baby. She asked me if I had him at the IMC, because she had just had a baby and was there. I said yes and that we were still here! She was in a room on the same floor we were. Her daughter had been born that morning - 3 days after Joey - and 6 weeks early. In fact, their daughter was in the NICU too, and across the hall from him for a few days. It was a tender mercy from the Lord for the week he ended up there to have friends there that were experiencing the same thing, that loved me and knew me. Their daughter got to go home the day after Joey did.
After the first night, Spencer and I had to check out of our room. The NICU has two family rooms that they give on a night to night basis. If someone is going home the next day, they get first shot. If the baby will be there a short time and mom is trying to breastfeed, they get second shot. I got the room that next night. Spencer went home and for the rest of the time Jody was in the NICU, he was at home most of the time but came to the hospital for a few hours every day, which was good for my sanity.
I tried to be there for most of the feedings. He ate at 2 am, 5 am, 8 am, 11 am, 2 pm, 5 pm, 8 pm, and 11 pm every day. Some nights I got the NICU room and others I didn't. I'd feed him at 5 am if I was there but not if I wasn't. Then I'd get there by 8 and stay through the 2 pm feeding. I'd go home, nap, shower, play with the kids and eat dinner. Then I'd head back to the hospital in time for his 8 and 11 pm feedings. Then I'd come home or head to bed there.
They gave all the NICU parents purple badges and we'd nod at each other and make conversation. There was a break room where we'd eat. Sometimes I'd go up to the cafeteria for ice cream or sit by the big windows and read a book. Sometimes I'd just snuggle with Joey for a few hours.
He passed all his tests. They said he had a small hole in his heart that was completely normal and would go away on its own over time. His billirubin levels got better after two days and then two days later went back down. He was on the lights for two days, off for two days, and back on for two. It was especially hard when he was on the lights. After two days of antibiotics, they took out the IV.
They said he basically just wasn't developed enough when he was born. He wasn't eating well enough because of it and we had to measure him before and after feedings to see how much he was getting.
He had a feeding tube down his nose for the first 5 days in the NICU and they'd feed him through that whatever else he needed after I nursed or he was given a bottle. The goal was for him to gain weight and get enough through bottle or breast for two straight days.
This task seemed impossible. Everyone kept telling me to have patience - that he'd just figure it out one day. Most of the nurses were great. A couple were a bit ornery. One was especially helpful - Patti. She was a shining ray of hope on the day he was put back on the lights.
The next day Joey started getting it. He ate enough for two days. He'd be going home on oxygen but he'd be going home!!
The night before he went home was the fourth of July. We had the kids and my mom come to the hospital and we got some of the yummy ice cream we had had so much during our stay. Then we sat on the balcony next to the cafeteria and watched the fireworks at Murray Park across the street. It was beautiful and such a great way to spend our last evening there.
